Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Daily Giving Up EVERYTHING!

"Any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple." Jesus

What does it look like to follow Jesus. Giving up everything. EVERYTHING?!?! It means I must completely lose my life for His sake to truly find my life. And little by little I am dying to myself, letting my life go and finding a truer more glorious life inside of Christ.

What does giving up everything really mean? As for me, it means putting everything on the alter...my hopes, dreams, desires, money, time, influence, resources...everything is His to use in whatever way He chooses. This is where I want to live. I don't want to draw lines in the sand and tell Him, you can not ask me to cross this line, I am at my limit. I don't even know my limit. I don't even know my own heart. I don't even know myself.

So today, I am entrusting all that I am to all that He is and asking Him to have full reign. I want to be poured out, serving Him in various ways with the gifts He has given me. I want to live for His approval alone, counting every praise from man as nothing compared to knowing my Lord is pleased with me. I want to worship Him in opening my home to strangers, I want to glorify Him in teaching my children why a lady bug has spots, I want to magnify Him as I wash my husband's dirty laundry. I want to open my ears to hear His voice and follow where He leads...working when I need to work, resting when I need to rest, playing when I need to play. I want to let Him have complete control...looking to Him moment by moment for the agenda of my day. I have many plans in my own heart, but I offer them up for His plans. I want my life to count for eternity today and tomorrow...and the next day.

Lord, have your way. I give up everything I am today to follow you. I want to be your disciple more than I want to get my checklist done, more than I want to see my hope's come to pass, more than I want to have a perfectly clean house, more than I want quiet, mild-mannered children :) Lord, today I want you more than I want life itself today!!!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

He is over all!

God has asked more of me than I thought I could ever give. I am completely under qualified and unequipped to do anything He has called me to...from the simplest of things to the most complex.

I do not have enough resources, time, energy or wisdom to carry out His will for my life...but He does. He is over all...He is more than enough.

My heart has been crying out for relief. I am realizing I am not super-woman. I am drowning in my weakness.

Even now...floating around in my mind are thoughts from the laundry needing to be done to the people and situations I need to spend concentrated time in prayer for.

Everything is moving from order to disorder on the outside. But inside I am alive. My flesh is being crushed and His Spirit within me is crying out for me to be poured out even more as a living sacrifice.

He is speaking to me in loud and quiet ways. From friends stocking my cabinets with food to feed the extra little people in our home, to the clear illumination as I read His word. He is speaking to my heart to bow down lower, to lose myself even more inside of His Son, to pour myself out for His glory and to make Him known in this earth.

I repent for not rejoicing in all that He is. I am asking Him to renew my heart and give me the grace to let Him have His way in every single part of me. I am choosing to cast aside the bothersome thoughts of unfinished chores and unanswered emails. I am looking into His beautiful face and laughing at the days to come...because after all, my life is not my own, it was bought with a price. I will let go of every idol I hold dear to embrace the cross. I will lay myself down here on the alter and trust Him to do whatever He chooses through this life He has given me as a gift.

If you happen to be reading this, help me through your prayers. He never intended for us to carry our burdens alone. He has given us His Spirit and each other. May we give Him full reign in our lives!!!