I got a text message from my sweet husband this morning that said, "I wrote a blog, will you edit it and post it for me?" I then went to my email and had this from him:
To my second Love,
I have heard it said that a man is only as good as his word. But we serve a God who is greater than His very Word. We serve a God whose greatness cannot be contained in all the words ever spoken.
A dozen years ago or so I prayed and ask God for three things concerning a wife.
1. That she have a passionate love for HIM.
2. That she be beautiful.
3. That she not interfere with my relationship with HIM.
These were big things to ask for an ex-drug dealer that had no money and little relationship skills. I also realized that number 3 was a prayer that went against His very word (1 Corinthians 7).
His Greatness cannot be contained even by His own word! For no language can express HIM. No language can communicate HIM. My soul burns for HIM!! My soul searches for the WORD that can describe HIM!! HE goes before me and shields my way! Your very hand upholds my every breath and I know You love me. LOOK at the great things He has done in my life!!! Even though His very words demanded justice and death to me, He placed it on His Beautiful Son!! His word demanded shame for my actions but instead He has given me HONOR! My insecurities are so deep but He has given me BOLDNESS, STRENGTH and PASSION. His word said my wife would distract me from HIM. But once again He is beyond HIS own word!!!!
When I wake to you sitting on the porch seeking HIS FACE!!! When I lie down in the bed and listen to you talk about the things He has revealed to you!! When I hear of the people you are ministering to!! When I see the Love and encouragement you express to our children! It makes me want to scream “WITH EVERYTHING." My passion for HIM explodes within me. HOPE RISES! DARKNESS TREMBLES AT OUR HOLY GOD!! For I know that our God is even stronger than HIS very word.
Maybe I am saying this wrong. I should say a God who does even more than what he says.
Man says much and does little. God does more than what He says.
We ask for mercy, He give us His very blood. We ask to be His servant, He makes us a royal priesthood. We ask for forgiveness and He comes inside and calls us friend. We ask Him to save us from death, He gives us abundant Life. I asked him for a woman who loves Him and He gave me you. I ask him for beauty and He gave me you. I asked Him for a woman who would not distract me and He gave me you.
Once again, a God who trumps His very word.
Thank You Lord the last 12 years,
Jerome
Of course I can not simply post this without responding :)
My Love,
I am only who I am today because you have been a mighty tool in the hand of our God to shape and mold me into a Goldy woman, a woman who fears His name and worships Him with all of her might because I have followed your example, your leadership.
I have seen His strength in you! You have used your strength to rebuild my broken life. When the Lord gave me to you I was deeply wounded and emotionally ruined because of many things that had nothing to do with you. Yet, with great joy, you took on the impossible task of fighting valiantly for my healing.
What is impossible with man is possible with God. God through you did the impossible in my life.
Most men would have taken advantage of my weakness or given up. Not you, you honored me, protected me, loved me, served me and at many times literally carried me to the very feet of Jesus.
I was not easy to love. I was not beautiful or sweet the way wives are suppose to be. Yet, you saw these things in me, though they were hidden so deep. You chose to search out the unseen beauty in me, the beauty that God saw, the beauty of His Spirit working all things together for my good because I loved Him. Yes, His Spirit was producing beauty from the ashes of my life, and you chose to let Him use you against great opposition!
I do not deserve the honor you give to me. I do not deserve the joy that you bring to me. I do not deserve to be living this beautiful life in Him together with you! Yet, I rejoice because of what He has done in me, what He has given to me, yes I REJOICE!
I understand who He is! I realize the greatness of His love! I can see clearly His character! I see the way He pursues the those who are broken! I see how He uses the weak to lead the strong! I see how He is a great Defender of those who love Him! I see how He makes all things new!
I see Him when I look at your life!
I see Him when you wake up singing His praises every morning. I see Him when you come home singing (VERY LOUDLY) His praises every evening. I see Him when you relentlessly minister to those even the church would give up on. I see Him when you come alive while discussing the scriptures. I see Him when you take person after person into our home. I see Him when you cry on your face in worship to Him. I see Him when you put me and our children first EVERY SINGLE TIME, in EVERY SINGLE THING. I see Him when you fight for orphans that you now call your own, even when you have never even met them. I see Him when you have long discussions with our boys about Jesus and how we have to devote our entire life to Him. I see Him every day and always in every area of your life. He permeates your very being. And I have the blessing, the joy, the honor of being one flesh with you. He daily spills over from your life into mine.
In humility, boasting in the Lord alone, I can say that WE, TOGETHER bring Him glory, our passion brings Him fame. You have lead US to this place in Him. I will never, ever be able to thank Him enough for the blessing of being married to someone so close to His heart!
I delighted myself in Him and He gave me the desires of my heart! He gave me a deep intimacy with Him, a great love for Him and He gave me you!
I love you,
Me
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