My Story - Part 16

I finally got enough nerve to go to the Sunday School "College and Career" class at the Baptist Church. I felt so incredibly awkward...like a fish out of water. I was determined to push past my fear. I was hungry for fellowship. One of the girls in the class who was very opposite of me....she was simple and pretty and sweet....invited me to an upcoming weekend retreat they were having. I agreed.

I was so nervous. I BEGGED my friend Shawna to go with me. She couldn't go. She loaned me some nice, conservative clothes though. That made me feel like I fit in more :) That retreat was a scary but necessary experience for me. They had a worship time that evening and it was the first time I ever heard "Lord, I lift your name on high." I was embarrassed because everyone knew the words and I didn't. I kept to myself and just soaked it all in. My favorite part was when they had us all go out into the woods with our bible and journals and spend time with God and then come back and share. Now this I knew how to do...in fact I felt like an expert at this point of spending time with God with my bible and journal.

When I was having my time with Him He took me to the verse in James that says to confess your sins to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed. I felt like he wanted me to seek out the sweet girl that invited me and confess everything to her. Well....I did. Can you imagine what she was thinking?? She had to have known I was a little odd but I am sure she didn't expect to hear everything I shared. She was precious. She encouraged me and prayed with me. I felt the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders.

I also remember having a conversation with a man in his 40's. I was telling him how excited I was about God. He encouraged me that my passion never had to fade. I think He was right! The bus ride back was much more comfortable that the one there. I felt a little less awkward around other believers. I was fitting in less and less with the world. These people shared my love for God and encouraged me in my walk. I wanted to be a part of a community of believers.