I decided after this retreat that I wanted to be baptized. I wanted to publicly express my love for God and wanted the old me to be buried in the watery grave! I also thought this would be a great way to get my mom and mammaw to come to church :)
Did I mention this was a HUGE baptist church. They had a balcony and the church was full every time I went. I had to stand in front of all these people and give a few minutes worth of my testimony in a microphone. I had only been to church a handful of times and it had not been too long since my last drug binge. Well, wouldn't it be just like Satan to tempt me the night before I was to be baptized...and wouldn't it be just like me to fall for it :) I went with a friend to her friend's house and we ended up smoking meth. I was up all night but I didn't care. I was NOT backing out. If it was one thing I had determination at this point. I had grabbed hold of the verse that says "Though a righteous man falls seven times he gets back up again." I was getting good at getting back up again by the power of His Spirit within me.
My mom and mammaw came. I publicly proclaimed my love for Jesus and was baptized. It was a wonderful feeling. The man that had come to the hospital when my mom was sick invited us to a lunch at the church. He was married with 2 young children. I remember sitting and talking with his wife and desiring to have a sweet family like theirs for myself one day. His wife was in her 30's. She told me that she had not been saved until she was 21 (that is how old I was) and I saw such a kindness and deep beauty in her. It filled me with hope! I wanted Him to make me into a godly woman so bad that I could hardly stand it...and He was!
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8 comments:
How many of us all bring out "night-before-church-sins" into our church walls? Come, just as you are! That is the beautiful thing about Christ.
And now, look at how he has grown and matured you so that you wouldn't bring in the smoking meth habits, but rather other things that he is now currently working on in you (and in me)!
He meets us where we are! Praise the Lord, for Great things He has done!
You have such a beautiful story. Thank you so much for continuing to share it.
And look at you now!
You don't me but Thank you! Thank you soooo much for sharing your story. I hope can forgive me as he has forgiven you.
Yeah GOD!
Wow!!!
I have been following your story, and I thank you so much for sharing, you are an inspiration! Your love for the Lord and your obedience to him is truly admirable. Stepping out of our comfort zones and following what the Lord asks us to do can be so difficult, and to share your story, well, Thank you!
What can wash away my sin? Nothing but the blood of Jesus!! We all stand at the foot of the cross just the same. And how amazing His grace is to change us from vile sinners to godly women who reflect His image to a watching world. Thank you for glorifying Him by your life and by Your words.
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