He is the Answer

It has been over 12 years since I first started chasing after Him. I would have never dreamed that it was going to be like this. I have been through different phases of 'ministry.' I have been through different phases of 'healing.' While everything around me seems ever-changing, He has been the one constant in my life. I have found He has always been and always will be the Answer. I have also found my 'healing' comes through 'ministry.'

In laying my issues on the alter, putting my focus on loving Him by loving others, my healing comes. In going where He leads me, no matter the sacrifice, joy comes. In my weakness, crying out to Him, strength comes. In confusion, choosing to trust Him, peace comes. In surrendering my dreams to take on His desires I am given more than I could possibly hope for. As I live out the crucified life I am finding purpose beyond measure. In losing my life for His sake I am finding it, every day.

Some days I feel so close to Him that I could fly away...so full of love for Him and others that my heart could burst. Some days I feel as though I am drowning in my weakness. One day I feel as though I am living and moving in step with His Spirit. The next day I feel as though my emotions are leading me to places far from Him.

As I allow Him to sift my emotions through His Truth day after day this is what I find. My life is not about me. It is not about my comfort and happiness or any other good feeling I may try to conjure up with the help of a little god. When I buy into this lie I am trapped. When I believe the Truth I am set free. The Truth is that I was created in the image of Christ. My life has always been intended to look like His. This includes humility, sacrifice, servant hood, love. True love, the kind that chooses to do what is right...the kind that seeks another's highest good over my own...the kind of love that does not ignore poverty or oppression but seeks justice...the kind of love that proves itself through action!

It is my prayer that my life would look more like this every day. It is my desire that I would decrease so that He can increase. May every person who is chasing after Christ with me live the crucified life, walk in the truth and share His love with a hurting world. His love is the Solution. He always was and always will be The Answer!

Matthew 16:24-26
24Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25For whoever wants to save his life[h] will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. 26What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?

We love you as Christ does...

Hi Mom Shanna,
To my sweet Mom Shanna, the one who I have in my dream always with the Lord Jesus Christ. Thank you for your time you spend with us, it helps us to learn more about God and we love it. Mom Shanna I want you to know that you are such a precious woman who has been a blessing to us. We want you to know we love you as Christ does. I want you to know that you are beautiful, precious and blessed in heaven. You show love to us as a parent and we will never forget it in our life time in this earth and also in heaven. I hope one day we will see you again together as one in heaven. I want you to know that God is sending you into this world to do His work and to save His people. Mom Shanna thank you so much for your gifts you send us, like the bibles, the dressing, the word you share with us and the rest of the things that I can't be able to remember. I want you to know that I love you mom Shanna. I like you so much mom. You are the one who I have in my dream. I love you mom.
From your daughter Mary 1 Rugiatu Kamara

Mary is so precious to me. My second visit we let the kids decorate T-shirts with puffy paint. Most of them wrote their favorite verses and then wore them proudly. Mary came to me and told me we had run out of T-shirts before she got one. I gave her one of my tank tops to decorate. Later that evening she brought it to me and gave it back as a gift. I held it out expecting to read her favorite bible verse. Instead, she had wrote in big letters 'I LOVE YOU MOM.' This was such a picture of God's love for me personally. I was willing to go to Africa to give and serve, yet one of the main reasons He sent me was to pour His love into my life through these precious ones. Mary was loving me as Christ does...a love that I do not deserve!

The greatest of these is love.

Hello Mum Shanna,

It is a great pleasure to write you this letter. This is one of my best trips you have ever visited us. I really enjoy this trip, you are such a good and sweet mum to me. I hope July trip will be like this one by hugging each other, going to the market, playing football match. The smile you gave me always makes me to feel good and happy. You will always be in my heart and also in my prayers. Your encouragement towards me makes me to turn my sorrow to joy. Just like what the bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:13 "Now faith, hope and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love." And your love towards me is so great. Please extend my greetings to my Dad Jerome and my three brothers at home.

Much Love,
Abu Bakarr (Big)

Oh how I love this boy! He is ALWAYS smiling. I am not exaggerating. He has the brightest, most beautiful smile of anyone I have ever known. He is the captain of the White Lions football team and takes great pride in this role. He often dances even when no one is around and there is no music playing. He is free-spirited. He lives to serve and serves with a happy heart. He is one of the first children in the home to attend a university. He is confident in the Lord's plans for Him. He believes God will use him to change his nation, so do I! He has become a son to me.

The love that the Lord gives you is the love that you give us.

Mom Shanna,

It is a wonderful time to write you this letter. I am so excited to know you through you coming into this home to have more time with us. May God bless you and keep you and your family safe. I want to say thank you for your wonderful work to us. You make us to know more about God. The love that the Lord gives you is the love that you give us. I love you so much. Thank you for everything that you have done for us. Thank you for giving us everything but the most thing that I want to thank you for is the word of God that you give us.

I love you,

Victoria

My most recent trip was the first time I spent time with Victoria. I fell in love with her. I found out from one of the boys that after my first visit in June, she wanted to take my name as her own. I am so glad the Lord connected our hearts on this latest trip. She is always laughing and smiling. When I think of her, even now, I think of the joy of the Lord. She is one of the 4 children who oversee the library. She is a hard worker. She is on the girls' White Lions soccer team. She is absolutely beautiful! I am constantly thinking of her and my heart longs to be with her again. She has become my daughter.

I love you the way fish loves water.

My Dearest Mum Shanna,

It is nice to see you again and I am so happy that you came back. Mum, you are so special to me and I love you so much. Thank you for the bible study. I really enjoy it. It blesses my heart and it makes me to have more time with God. Mum, you are always in my heart and I want you to know that I love you like the way fish loves water. Also, you show me what it means to have a mum like you because you are so lovely and caring. You will always be in my prayers. May God almighty bless you and keep you safe and bless your going out and coming in. Thank you so much. I miss you mum.

Love,

Rachel Fatu Dumbuya

Rachel is always smiling. When I am in the home she is content to just be near me. She has an incredible desire to learn more about the bible. During my last two visits she would come to many times in the still part of the evening when I was going to bed and ask me to do a bible study with her. She radiates the beauty and love of Christ. She is my daughter.

Letters from Sierra Leone, Africa

I have decided that the best way to explain why I keep returning to the orphans in Sierra Leone, Africa is to give you a peek into their hearts. May you understand my love for them by reading their recent letters to me.

When the Lord closed my womb, I had no idea He still intended to give me the many children I desired. He has done this in a delightfully, unexpected way. His ways are higher than mine. His ways are perfect.

He has given me many children who long to have parents. He has connected our hearts beyond space and time. He has kept us close through prayer, letters and visits. He has knit our hearts together by the power of His Love. This Love is strong enough to heal a human heart and an entire nation.

The kids will tell you I give them something they long for, the love of a mom. I will tell you that they give more to me than I can ever give to them. In losing my life for His sake, I have found it.

May you see, like I have, why God has called us to love the orphans, widows, poor and needy. It is as much for our benefit as it is the people He is calling us to love. May you see why I keep returning to this tiny, poor and undeveloped nation. The children of the Wellington Orphanage have captured my heart and I will never be the same. As you read their letters in the following posts I pray you would be as captured by the beauty of these precious ones as I am.

'Mother of Many Nations'

Dear Mom,
Thank you so much for spending time with my brothers and sisters in the home. I also want to thank you for all the provision and shopping. If I fail to thank you it does not mean I am not grateful. I just want to express my love and appreciation to you and everybody in the family. I will continue to pray so that you will continue to come to our nation, Sierra Leone. God has blessed us with a lovely mother like you. I tell you this I will never forget you in my heart and memories, including my prayers. God has blessed me through you in many ways. He answered my prayer through you. You are the sweetest mother that I ever meet with. Thank you for caring for me and always remember me in your thoughts. God will bless you always. You are like Sarah, the wife of Abraham because God has blessed your nation and He has given you so many children both in the USA and in Africa. You are mother of many nations. God loves you and He is always there for you. I want you to say hello to everybody.
I love you,
Gabriel

This letter is from one of the boys in the home, Gabriel. He just turned 19. He loves to play soccer (football). He is on the White Lions football team. He also coaches the football team for the younger boys in the home. He feels a great sense of responsibility towards all of the younger children in the home. He wants to be a doctor one day. He is dedicated to his studies. He is a servant. I have seen him many times put others above himself and help others who are weaker than he. He is very funny and playful. Younger children are drawn to him. He is active and takes risks when others won't. He is sensitive, yet strong. He likes to write poetry. He plays the guitar and has an amazing voice. He loves to worship God through music. He believes that the Lord is preparing him to be a Nehemiah of his nation, so do I. He has a heart for the lost. He acknowledges the Lord's hand in all of his accomplishments big or small. He loves the Lord deeply from a place of brokenness, humility and worship. He is my son.