Treasure Time

I am stranded at home. The boys are at grandma and grandpa's and my van won't start. Guess Jesus wanted me all to Himself :)

I sat at my kitchen table listening to the new Matt Redman CD and writing in my journal. (I even danced a little in my kitchen). I will share my after thoughts with you...

I am learning many things on my journey with the Lord. Lately I am learning to be still and content. I am learning to love deeply, the painful kind of love that comes along with compassion. The kind of love that is intermingled with sorrow and joy. The kind of love that Jesus must have felt when He was on the earth.

As I journey on I feel more and more like a stranger in this world. I feel less and less like I fit in, honestly even in christian circles at times. My heart breaks greater than ever because I am faced with the need of humanity. I have an increasingly burning desire to help many different people and yet time and ability keep me from this which leaves a dull ache in my heart. All of these things are forcing me to be still and wait on Him. To know that He is God. To know that when He alone is my Treasure I will be satisfied with a deep joy. To know that if I set my affections fully on Him, hiding myself in Him, delighting in Him alone I will being doing His will. To know that If I abide in Him He will produce the fruit I desire in my life. To know that if trust Him with ALL of my heart He will lead me to the people and places I am called to pour His love into.

This morning He has reminded me that I must come to Him when my well runs dry. He is the Living Water. I cannot offer my husband, my children, or anyone else something that I do not have. The only thing of eternal value I could ever offer anyone comes from His hand. I must daily seek Him out.

Some times a day here or there can turn into several days of not making Him my first and highest priority. The demands of my life and others' lives take precedence over my time alone with Him...even if only in my thoughts. In His grace and mercy He has carved out this morning for me. He has forced me to be still and know that He is God. Not only because He delights in the time He has me all to Himself but because He knows that He is the only One who will truly satisfy my soul.

He knows my desire is to pour into the lives of others. He has set aside this morning to give me the love that I so desperately want to give away to the people I am burdened for. This time alone with Him has been a precious treasure from Jesus. I do not deserve to be so lavishly loved by my sweet, sweet Lord!