Friendship and Coffee

I had coffee with two amazing women Friday morning. One of these women, Ixie, lives in California and she is here visiting my friend Sally. I met Ixie for the first time on my second trip to Sierra Leone, Africa in November of last year. On our trip we were all so enthralled with the kids that we didn't get the time together that I wished we would have. So you can imagine how excited I was for this coffee date! I knew from watching Ixie with the kids in Africa and all that Sally had shared with me about her that she was an extraordinary person. I couldn't wait to get know her better...to just be in her presence.

As we sat in the coffee shop I asked Ixie to share the story of how she came to Christ. I NEVER tire of hearing these stories. In fact, I have often thought of how wonderful it would be if we could listen to these stories for all of eternity once we are in heaven. I think it would spur on the most powerful worship experience that has ever been.

I loved hearing how the Lord pursued my precious friend and rescued her from despair. It is so beautiful to me. She is madly in love with the Lord. He has given her a wonderful life in Him. She is thanking Him for that life by pouring His love into others.

As I listened to her story my heart filled with hope for the lost again. There are many people being pursued by God this very moment. Some of those people are overlooked by the church or scoffed at by the world. I have hope for them. I have hope for the least of the least.

He always has and always will use the weak to lead the strong. This is one of the things I love most about His character. When we come to him feeble and powerless, in complete surrender, He uses our lives to make a difference in significant ways. He delights in raising us up from the ashes of our broken lives to display His beauty for the world to see.



He is weaving together the lives of people who's hearts who are devoted to Him. As we talked we were marvelling at the way God had connected Ixie to Sally's life when she needed family. He connected Sally to my life when she needed community. He connected my life to theirs when I needed friendship.

Even though I have only known Ixie a short while...even though Sally and Ixie have been friends many more years that Sally and I...for those 2 hours in that coffee shop it felt like the 3 of us had been friends for all of our lives. It felt as if the 3 of us had a mutual love for each other, the Lord and humanity. This can only be God. Just another one of His miracles. Just another reason I am so happy I said yes to Him 13 years ago. Just another reason I am thankful that He is a relational God who has called us to place worth and value in relationships and not material possessions. Just another reason to praise Him!

We rambled on about our love for those sweet orphans on the coast of West Africa, our wonderful husbands and few things in between. I can't help but think that God flew Ixie all the way to Oklahoma to give me that time as a special gift. Ok, maybe that's not the only reason, but I bet it is part of the reason. He delights in giving His children good gifts...and what better gifts than friendship and coffee :)

I love you sweet friends!

Our Royal Position

Esther 4:14 For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?"

As I was reading through Esther the verses above stood out to me like they hadn't before. I kept coming back to them over the next few days.

Here is how they have settled in my heart. I do not want relief and deliverance to arise from another place for even one single person I am called to help. I never want to misuse my royal position in Christ by doing nothing.

Esther was tempted to think she could sit in silence because of her royal position and ignore the edict sent out to destroy the jews. I too find these temptations in my own life.I too have been given a royal position in Christ for a purpose. God does not NEED to use me to bring relief and deliverance to anyone. He is God. He can do this Himself. He could use a donkey if He chose. No, He certainly doesn't need me to accomplish justice or mercy. But the joy when He chooses to use me. The joy. Nothing compares.

I am burdened for many people. I am praying for the Lord to give me the courage to act in these peoples' lives. I do not want to be held back by fear or complacency or intimidation of the needs. I do not want to ignore the injustice all around me. I do not want to ignore the injustice that is half way accross the earth just because it isn't directly in front of me either. I want to go boldly and humbly before my King and ask Him to bring relief and deliverance through me. Please join me. I promise, together we can change the world with His love.

Daughters of the King

I had a plan for the teeanged girls' group on Monday. God had another plan. His plan was better. So much better.

These girls AMAZE me.

One of the girls came with a list of honest questions. She wanted to know things from, 'Can you lose your salvation?' to 'Are Jews going to heaven or hell?' to 'Does God talk back when you pray?' to 'If you don't ask for forgiveness for a sin and you die will you still get to go to heaven?' to 'How do people in remote parts of the world who have never heard of Christ get saved?' AND MORE. Her questions, I am certain were prompted by God. It opened up a tremendously wonderful dialogue between all of us. Her questions gave some of the other girls the courage to ask about their own concerns. I will tell you that not all of the girls that come and sit in my living room each week have given their lives to Christ. I have had this feeling for some time. Monday night it was confirmed by at least one of the girls. Can I tell you how happy this makes me.

This is why:

During a worship event friday night a line in one of the songs made me start weeping. The song said, "For all your sons and daughters who are walking in the darkness, You are calling us to lead them back to you."

We were all birthed into this world with the intention that we would become His children, a part of His family. There are those who are walking in darkness and we, as Jesus' followers, are called to lead them back to their Creator, their heavenly Father.

The girls that come to my house each week to hang out and listen to us ramble on about this Jesus we love so much...that allow us to get into their business and live this sometimes messy life with them...are no longer walking in the darkness. The ones that have not yet surrendered their lives to Him, now have hope, that maybe, just maybe this Jesus is the real deal and religion isn't the only option if they choose to follow Him.

The morning after group I cried as I prayed for these precious girls. Tears of joy. I am so humbled that God would allow me to play the smallest role in their lives. While I feel an enormous responsibility for their spiritual well-being, I am humbled that He would allow me to feel this at all. Who am I that I should have such a precious opportunity to pour into the lives of these beautiful daughters of the King!

Psalm 45:11 The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your lord.

Jesus is Attractive

I met some new friends this weekend.

I have coffee with Crystal on Saturday mornings. This week her aunt and sister were visiting her for the weekend. Crystal had a plan...to offer her sweet family hope. Her plan included me. She wanted me to come over and casually share my testimony. Once I got there and we all got settled with a cup of coffee I followed Crystal's prompts. Before I knew it as I was sharing, I was enthralled all over again by the sweet, sweet love story of me and my Jesus. He is precious to me...so precious. Apparently they too were enthralled by our love story.



After I left they both opened up and shared how they needed what Crystal and I have. Not religion, but intimacy with the God who fills us with love, joy, peace and hope!



Crystal shared this story with the teenaged girls on Monday. She told them to take heart when they are fearful of sharing Christ with their friends.

Jesus is attractive when He is presented through a life of someone who is madly in love with Him. So please, choose to be madly in love with Him. The world DESPERATELY needs to see this. The needs of people are great. Religion will not do. The gospel is attractive because it works. Jesus changes everything. He doesn't need us to explain or defend Him. He just needs us to tell the world how much He loves them and desires to make all things new in their lives.

I am re-inspired to tell the world of His love one person at a time. Will you join me?

And Crystal, you spur me on sweet friend. Thank you for your contagious compassion! You are loving the Lord with all your heart, in action and in truth!

Treasure Time

I am stranded at home. The boys are at grandma and grandpa's and my van won't start. Guess Jesus wanted me all to Himself :)

I sat at my kitchen table listening to the new Matt Redman CD and writing in my journal. (I even danced a little in my kitchen). I will share my after thoughts with you...

I am learning many things on my journey with the Lord. Lately I am learning to be still and content. I am learning to love deeply, the painful kind of love that comes along with compassion. The kind of love that is intermingled with sorrow and joy. The kind of love that Jesus must have felt when He was on the earth.

As I journey on I feel more and more like a stranger in this world. I feel less and less like I fit in, honestly even in christian circles at times. My heart breaks greater than ever because I am faced with the need of humanity. I have an increasingly burning desire to help many different people and yet time and ability keep me from this which leaves a dull ache in my heart. All of these things are forcing me to be still and wait on Him. To know that He is God. To know that when He alone is my Treasure I will be satisfied with a deep joy. To know that if I set my affections fully on Him, hiding myself in Him, delighting in Him alone I will being doing His will. To know that If I abide in Him He will produce the fruit I desire in my life. To know that if trust Him with ALL of my heart He will lead me to the people and places I am called to pour His love into.

This morning He has reminded me that I must come to Him when my well runs dry. He is the Living Water. I cannot offer my husband, my children, or anyone else something that I do not have. The only thing of eternal value I could ever offer anyone comes from His hand. I must daily seek Him out.

Some times a day here or there can turn into several days of not making Him my first and highest priority. The demands of my life and others' lives take precedence over my time alone with Him...even if only in my thoughts. In His grace and mercy He has carved out this morning for me. He has forced me to be still and know that He is God. Not only because He delights in the time He has me all to Himself but because He knows that He is the only One who will truly satisfy my soul.

He knows my desire is to pour into the lives of others. He has set aside this morning to give me the love that I so desperately want to give away to the people I am burdened for. This time alone with Him has been a precious treasure from Jesus. I do not deserve to be so lavishly loved by my sweet, sweet Lord!

Creator God

This morning at breakfast the boys and I started talking about how the world began and how it continues on. I found out Micah does not think dinosaurs ever existed and Silas firmly does! (love those boys) As we discussed evolution, the big bang theory and creation we decided to look up information online. We read a bunch of articles and watched several videos. At the end we all agreed that we believe God spoke the world into existance and holds everything together still today.

I am amazed at the order and complexity of our universe. I am more amazed that God has given us the ability to discover parts of this mystery. After our research today I am more stunned than ever by His majesty and power and love. He has created earth for lil' ole us. He has put us in the PERFECT place in space so that our planet can sustain life. If one thing were slightly out of place then everything would fall apart. He is holding all things together.

The One who, in love, has created and sustains planet earth cares about every detail of my life...my boys' lives...the orphans' lives in Africa...the widows' lives in South America and the single moms' lives right here in America. He is sovereign over the events of the earth and the events of our lives. I don't understand even an inkling of it all but by faith and learning to trust Him more and more each day.

He is majestic, powerful and full of love, mercy and justice.

As Mr. Beaver says to Lucy in C S Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia (the book, not the movie) ”He’s not a tame lion!” Nor is He “safe.”

In that same passage from the book, Lucy asks Mr Beaver if Aslan, the Lion representing Christ, is “safe”. To which he responds, "Safe? Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I tell you."

Acts 17:28 'For in him we live and move and have our being.' As some of your own poets have said, 'We are his offspring.'

Are you scared of a girl?

I snuggled with my sweet boys in my warm and cozy bed yesterday morning. We were reading through The Story Book Bible. We were reading about Elijah.

Later yesterday afternoon I stole a few minutes to sneak back in my warm and cozy bed to pray for a few people who have been on my heart. My thoughts kept drifting to Elijah...

I was thinking how odd it was that he had just stood boldly in the presence of King Ahab and declared the Lord God was the one true God and denied the power of Baal. He was then used to prove God's power by calling fire from heaven to consume a sacrifice drenched in water at Mount Carmel. Then he prayed for rain after a severe drought and the Lord sent rain. Right after when Ahab's wife, Jezebel, a Baal worshipper, heard about these things She was furious. She sent a messenger to tell Elijah that she would kill him by the next day...and he took off running and hid.

Did he forget all the Lord had done in and through Him? Did he forget the way the Lord had provided for Him and protected Him? Did he forget how God had faithfully led him through trial after trial? Did he forget how the Lord had delivered him in times of trouble?

I can relate with Elijah. I also tend to be forgetful of all the Lord has done when faced with a new trial, struggle or temptation in my life.

I find comfort in knowing that this amazing man of God was motivated by fear at times just like me. I am thankful that God understands I too am dust.

Maybe Elijah needed to be reminded that apart from God's power he was scared and weak. Maybe I also need this reminder.

It wasn't Elijah's greatness that caused God to choose him to be a prophet. It was God who made Elijah great in spite of his weaknesses!

How I need to remain desperate before Him. How I need to choose to trust Him in each and every trial, struggle and temptation that WILL come into my life this side of heaven. I must choose to trust in His perfect love every minute of every day. It is His perfect love that will cast out the fear that many times motivates my disobedience.

Sweet Girls

Monday nights are one of my favorite nights of the week. I have a handful or sweet teenaged girls that come hang out at my house. I love to hear about their week, pray, laugh, read and discuss the scriptures, eat, cry and did I say laugh with them :) I love these girls so much!



Tonight we continued our discussion on spiritual gifts. I see them growing and maturing.

I see them tossing aside religion for an active relationship with the living God. I see them seeking Him out through their pain and with their tough questions. I see them having compassion on those who are hurting. I see them seeking to have healthy relationships with their family. I see them taking delight in the Lord and understanding that He takes delight in them.

They have much working against them to have the freedom to be all that God created them to be. So many people and things are crying out for their focus and affections...so many little gods. On many different levels they are turning their hearts towards Him again and again against great opposition. I love these girls like daughters!

This life is He has given me is filled with such joy and purpose.


Well, this post is short and sweet because my boys just got home. Asher ran in and said, "Mommy is your bible group over." I could eat him up he is so stinkin' cute! AAWWW I have the best life!

Jesus Loves Me

I have felt this conviction to start writing in my blog again...but I haven't felt motivated or inspired. I guess this post is me stepping out in faith and seeing what happens. So you might not be greatly moved by what I write :)

I had a late night party with Jesus 'till 4:30 this morning. I felt so full and content. I prayed and read and meditated and filled my mind with lots of amazing truths! I have been trying to convince myself it's OK if I can't sleep sometimes, well, a lot of times, because Jesus is better than sleep.

As the day has worn on I have worn down. I went from being on a spiritual high at church to crying on my closet floor by this evening to smiling and happy again. (This doesn't surprise some of you. I tend to be labeled as a bit emotional).

It amazes me how powerful our emotions can be. Today, I have scream-laughed because I was so excited to see Sally at church this morning. By lunch I let out a high-pitched squeal because Crystal told me that someone donated the $5,000 we needed to send sweet miss Deborah Lange to Africa. By the time I finished my tortilla soup I was frustrated because I had a stomach ache. Once we got home fatigue really set in and my wildly loud (sweet) boys had my frustration pushed to really bad irritation. Then my husband told me some discouraging news about a situation I was praying about during my middle-of-the-night Jesus party and I ended up crying in my closet with my bible and journal. Jesus wiped away my tears, my sweet husband took my crazy boys to the store so it would be quiet for a few minutes and now I am back to normal...well, kind of :)

I am so thankful that through the highs and lows of our emotions...through life...His love is constant. He doesn't change. He gives a peace and joy and strength that super cedes our circumstances, hormones and whatever else! I have no idea how He puts up with me and loves me so perfectly...but I am so glad He does! I am super in love with Him!!!

Don't ask me how the picture goes with the blog....I just thought it was fun :)

I need Africa more than Africa needs me!

Thank you so much if you have given towards my upcoming trip to Sierra Leone! If you haven't would you please prayerfully consider making a donation, no matter how small.

I have been thinking of and praying for those sweet children in the Wellington Orphanage almost constantly! My heart longs to be with them. I know this is the Lord. He is so beautiful to me.

I want to share something with you... My husband came home from work yesterday crying. He walked through the door listening to worship on his iphone with tears streaming down his face. He walked back to our room and continued worshipping. A little later he shared with me what sparked his emotion. He started listening to a new Steven Curtis Chapman CD at work yesterday. The entire album was birthed out of the pain of Steven losing their 5 year old daughter, Maria. The Chapmans have 3 birth children and had 3 adopted girls from China before they lost Maria. Their 5 year old little girl was run over by an SUV on accident. This family has a deep love for God and a passion to help orphans in various ways.

Later that day my husband started listening to the new Matt Redman CD on his way home from work. The lyrics are very worshipful and helped draw him into the majesty of God. As we sat on the couch discussing these things he started crying again. The tears were not sad tears. He spoke to me of the beauty of God. How wonderful the Lord is that He took this sweet 5 year old little girl that nobody wanted at one time and used her in such a powerful way. She is the face of heaven to Steven Curtis Chapman, just as each of us is the face of heaven to God. This is the beauty of the Lord. He delights in using the weak. He delights in rescuing the lost and hurting. He finds great joy in bringing beauty from the ashes of our lives.

I recently heard someone say whom I love and respect, that as she tucks her children into bed at night that she is NOT OK with there being 132 million orphans in the world. Neither am I.

I can't do much. But by the grace of God I want to do everything I can. I can let God use me in the lives of 80 orphans on the coast of west Africa. I have many hopes and desires for these children. There are many things I can do from America to advocate on their behalf. But, it is my greatest joy to actually go and be with them. I love to spiritually encourage them and given them the love of a parent several weeks a year. Each time I leave them they beg me to return. What I think they will never understand, no matter how many times I tell them, is that I need them more than they need me!

I want to share a quote from Steven Curtis Chapman because this too is our heart: "After our first trip to China, my wife and I knew our lives were changing -- our eyes and hearts were opening to how big God really is, and we have wanted to experience more of that,"

"We've really wondered whether or not we should just go to China and stay there. But I don't think so. I believe God is saying, 'I want you to go, get your heart broken, your eyes opened, and then take this story back to the church in America and around the world."' .

I too desire this. I can not do this without your help. I humbly ask you to consider giving towards my trip. I will be traveling to Sierra Leone December 28th through January 9th. My promise to those who give is to do everything I can while I am there to strengthen and encourage these precious ones. I promise to work hard helping them with their education. I promise to love them deeply!

I still need $900 to be able to purchase my plane ticket. I am behind on my first deadline. If you would like to give all donations are tax deductible. You can make your checks payable to 4HIM ministries or OASIS ministries to receive tax credit. You can mail them to me at 1700 Godhania Rd. Edmond, OK 73003.

Thank you so much for loving, encouraging and supporting me. I love the body of Christ. I love you all!

In His Love,

Shanna Crawford

http://pushingbackdarkness.com/ (the Sierra Leone blog) http://shannacrawford.blogspot.com/ (my personal blog)

http://www.4-him.net/ (4HIM's website)